As for the Miller High Life? It IS the Champagne of Beers, you know. Believe it or not, I need it for a project I'm doing, and I can't say more in case someone I know is reading this. Oh wait, that won't happen -- okay, I'm making party invitations for an organization I belong to, and I need three flattened beer cans, the taller the better. I had forgotten they even made quart-sized cans (we're a bottled beer household) so imagine my glee at discovering these! Then I remembered the lyrics of every rap song I've ever sat through, and my heart sank as I realized I was buying big-ass beers -- AND STILL HAD TO TAKE THEM THROUGH THE CHECK STAND. In my local grocery store. On a Sunday. On which I did not attend church. Sigh.
As for the Red Herring Groceries, if you've ever been the parent of a 4th grader, and you live in California, you know why I needed three cartons of sugar cubes and a metric ton of lasagna noodles: it's time for Sparky to make a huge mess in the kitchen her mother cry her model of the San Rafael Mission out of glue, sugar cube bricks and tears as much floral greenery as we can get away with. Oh, crap, I forgot the glue.
Should have rounded out the weirdness and bought two jars of black shoe polish and a hair net, just to confuse nosy clerks.