Lessee . . . good tan? Check.
Long legs? Check.
Sun-streaked hair? Check.
Gorgeous smile? Check.
Oh, stoppit. Just show us the picture already.
Elle MacPherson will play you in the movie, Janice. She'll have to learn the gentle Mathews accent, and we may have to dub in your larger-than life laugh, but that's what post-production is for.